Just Pass Me By

On Friday we had my mom in law Funeral. It was a hard day. Over the past 2 years my husband and I have felt like we have carried a lot of the weight on our shoulders and haven’t been allowed to show any feelings or emontions. I was annoyed by a couple of things that happened at the funeral but I try to just ignore it. I found out mom had spoke about me often in a very pleasant way. This made me feel good about myself, and I never thought I made that much of a impact to be spoke about.
We met our nephew who was adopted for the first time, he was a sweet young man. I have reservation of the adoptive father and hope their isn’t any truth found it it. Towards the end of the funeral there was a doe watching us. I took that as a Sign from G-d that he had mom, and she was with him. I was stairing off more toward the corner field, and not the pastor even though I was watching him. The doe caught my attention she watched almost the whole time.
I was on my feet a lot longer then I should have been. My acher and ankle was bothering me a little bit. By the end of the night I was at a point of enough is enough, I stood all day and I aint having one more person tell me I am not doing enough for this family, or that my husband hasn’t. My ankle was hurting, I wonder which takes longer what I did or Plantar Fasciitis. I am betting on the later.
We were at one of our family member who lives next door. They are like family, they are a good family and by the end of the night I had snapped at one of them I had never met. I felt attacked and responded after she raised her voice and was snapping. I did the likes of the same. At the end we found out we were both just frustrated with the money aspect of it and feeling guilty on one part and me feeling angry that I was hearing what hubby and I were doing wasn’t good enough. It was building up and it just had to come up for both of us. I am glad her father, who like a son to mom and dad, was able to see what was going on even through his own grief. When we finally got down to everything and got it all out we all felt better and where laughing. On the way back over to their house I saw a frog jumping through the yard, don’t ask me how I managed to see him before stepping on him. I am glad I didn’t step on him. It reminded me of mom story of the frog she burried.