Poor Otis

Ever do something thinking, I have to protect my cat, but end up sending the wrong message. That what I did last night. Dad was able to get his dog from the foster home who been training for some stuff, she not a service dog but a companion dog because of dad emotional and mental state of mind. Dad been very happy I haven’t seen him smile this much. Him not having the dog isn’t a option. Otis gets along with dogs, and I knew shadow got along with cats, so when I brought Shadow home I just lift her have free run of the house which would have been find…..
At first Otis and Shadow just sniffed each other butts, okay not worrying about it. They played for a little while, so I felt hopeful. Otis came to get attention from me and Shadow wasn’t going to have nothing to do with that, so every time I gave Otis attention, Shadow would attack Otis. Well, Shadow is very territorial, so giving her the run of the house was not wise.
After giving Otis some attention I had to go to the bedroom to print up a couple of things, so I went in. I decided that Shadow should not be allowed in the Master Bedroom that is mine and bubby’s room, and well Otis place to go when Shadow is to much for him. Otis played very gently with Shadow, so he is very fatherly type of a cat, and will not do much damage to the dog. Otis was hissing and growling loud and shadow will beating up on the cat. I told Shadow No, bad… Otis is used to me just saying bad, and knowing he better find the Westgate out of trouble.
I picked up Otis to get him away from Shadow, and brought Otis into our bedroom, and gave him attention. Otis was very upset, and didn’t much want any attention from me.. When I got done with my work, I came back out with Otis and Shadow started in on the cat again. Otis got so frustrated he shed a bunch of hair under his chair, and was growling and shaking, he peed on himself. Otis has never done that so I can’t much blame him. I brought Otis back to the bedroom with me for a while, and give him more attention and love. By removing Otis I was showing Shadow she was boss not Dad or I and hubby or Otis who lived her first and this is his home. Otis had tears in his eyes by the time I’d gotten him in the bedroom with me. This wasn’t the right thing for me to do.. Yes I was right in wanting to protect cat, but I should have grabbed Shadow first and put her dad’s bedroom, but I felt that would be mean, and both pets should have the run of the house.
I got very worried about Otis because he was showing to many signs of stress, hiding under his chair and even with me pulling him out form their doing his low meow of leave me be or else, and walking away crunch as close to the floor as he could, I got worried about Otis and his responds, so I brought him back to the room. After a while I decided I would call the dog sitter I clearly need help Shadow not listening and I have stressed out cat on my hands.
When I called I told her I have a question and I do not know what to do. I told her the interactions first question was is the cat okay. Well their no physical damage, so yeah but Otis is really upset. I told her what Shadow was doing. Here I was worried about Otis hurting Shadow and not the other way around. Otis is close to 20 pounds he’s not a tiny cat, Shadow is oh maybe 6 pounds so how can one little dog cause so many problems for Otis, poor Otis.
What I was told is that I should have picked up Shadow, not Otis and put shadow in dad’s bedroom.. Otis I should have came back to.. But you know it’s hard Otis is like my little one, so to watch him being picked on my first instinct was to pick him up. What I was told is that for the next 24 to maybe 48 hours shadow is to be confined to one room, she is not to have free run of the house, because she will try to run control over it.. She needs to learn the humans and cat are in charge. I think Otis won’t care as long as he can get his love from me and attention from me. He has shared me with other dogs, and will be welling to share me with Shadow. If Shadow was a service dog for deafness or sight she would strictly be dad’s dog, and Otis would have no worry, but shadow is a companion dog so their a small different.
I think I might have dad and Shadow both go through some training together. Plus I will need to find something to clean up her bathroom mistakes she retaliating against me! What I have learned when you introduced two different animals it’s wise to let them meet each other and if you have one already there and bring a new on in. It if the new one starts being territorial that it’s okay to place it in a bedroom and give it a smaller area to be in.
Tomorrow depending on how Otis is acting I will let shadow out, but if he still acting scared then I might have to let them visit with each other every day for a little while, then put Shadow back in the room, and gradually increase their time together. I believe Otis and Shadow will eventually get very close to each other.. They were fine until I gave Otis attention..

They’re keeping me home

Dad is having a hard time adjusting, to all of the changes. He thinks it’s mean to say until he learns his way around we do not want him going out a lone. Not to be mean but he is not remembering things and if he gets lost, I worry I or hubby wouldn’t be able to get to him before someone with bad intentions. I feel the need to protect him.
Dad is 86 and a WW2 vet, I try to treat him the way I would want my own parents to be treated at that age. This weekend dad told one of our friends that we was being mean to him, he says it a lot. So I explained to them why I wasn’t leaving him leave by himself. He doesn’t remember things and geesh sometimes it better to say let us go with you, or come with us out places. Lately I been having Dad tell me how to get home, from places. He getting better but still doesn’t know. He can tell me how to get home from about the community college over here, and from Lunds our local grocery store, I think he might be able to tell me how to get home from Cubs our other store. But he thinking about going to the casino by himself and he been there once and doesn’t remember the route of even how to get there, so isn’t it safer for hubby and I to drive him around, I don’t mind doing it. Dad doesn’t always look where he’s going neither which means in the city he could have a accident. I rather see him safe, then see him in a accident. Shoot car insurance is already expensive for him. We have a family plan trying to keep his cost down, he’s paying more then I did on risk insurance when I had no insurance.
There is a community center here that have activities for him, we try to get him involved but it’s all nos, then comments of I feel like I in Jail, Well you wouldn’t feel that way if you took us up on the offer to go out, or go and get involved with community center they have senior lunches, and many activities.
Dad is so worried about those who have taken advantage of him no longer wanting to speak with him. Okay one person I am thinking of took close to 900 if not more from dad, and he worried that she mad at him. She mad because his purse strings are closed to her. He worried about his daughter who honestly should learn to side with her dad on this problem not with this friend of her that a leech. I worry about dad because he so worried about those who take advantage of him, she should be fighting by our side and not yelling at me and my husband. She is very disrespectful towards everyone, and dad don’t even want to be around her. She’s had him so scared once since we living with us to the point of hiding in a dark room. We talked to dad and explained to him what was going on.
Yesterday dad said a lot of stuff that later he felt bad for and didn’t know where or why he said what he said, and expressed fears I want to get raid of him to because he been at 3 places and all three places has been conflict two of which he lift feeling like a failure. I told Dad we wouldn’t get raid of him, and that he can stay her, sometimes we have to place limits it not to be mean or because we don’t want you to have freedom but we do not want you to get lost and have you lost in a bad place and get hurt. He told someone who was a mandated reporter I was being mean and not letting him leave this weekend. She a psychiatrist of some kind, she told me what she does, and does something similar to what I would like to do. She asked me about it what was going on, and when I explained she looked at dad and said you didn’t tell me about that, and dad laughed and said I can’t get away with nothing. By the end of the night I asked if I could have her phone number because there were something I would like to talk and since she been a caregiver she might be able to help me deal with the stuff. I don’t think dad at the place yet where we need to say no more driving but he’s probably close, if he can’t start remembering how to get home form places we go to often, I do not want him driving around, he could end up in TX somewhere. On Monday he has a doctor appointment and I am thinking some of our concerns will be brought up to the doctor about dad. We love dad and don’t want nothing to happen to him.
I know my husband and I are not alone dealing with this but sometimes it feels pretty lonely.

That Hurts Otis, No

I think, I talk to Otis as if he was a child, instead of telling him simply no, it’s been ouch. Last night I was talking to my dad’s dog sitter and I guess Otis felt I was on the phone too long. He came into the bedroom where I was with my husband because our Dog sitter is a advocate and there have been some things going on, and I was sharing with her my concerns if we have to move. Frankly rent each month has been a challenge and we are worried if they move it up any higher or if we have to find a new place to live, how to come up with rent and deposit the thing is I can’t lose Otis neither. Otis has got me through a lot and well frankly I am not welling to give him up. I will be working part time it’s all I can manage between being dad primary caretaker, a full time student, and a wife with more then enough house work. I love dad but you know when things in life start changing and you have my personality you worry when you don’t try to find solutions. She gave me a lot of helpful insight, and gave my info to someone else.

I was sitting on the bed and Otis came up, so I started petting him and scratching him behind his ear. Otis decided he bite my hand, not hard but hard enough for me to say ouch bad Otis. So I lift him be, and then he bite me again, No Otis that hurts. So I started petting him trying to get him to be happy I guess and he started attacking, okay time to play with kitty but on the bed is not the best place for us to play and I know this we have a air bed and all we’d need is Otis clawing it.

Otis must be feeling attention starve or something because he been doing a lot to get my attention, must need to give him more time.. I should start taking pictures of him being naughty, but I have so many pictures, I wonder if I am going to need a new memory for the cellphone. Well at least Otis has been hiding behind the tv stand

Strange

Strange is the word of the day. Yesterday morning I bumped into my garage neighbor car, but she not my neighbor on my floor. I didn’t have paper on me and had a lot of things to do, so instead of running back down and leaving a note on the car. I called management to see if they could tell me, who owned the car, this way I could just run over to them quickly and tell them I bumped their car.

I didn’t see any damage but it not exactly light in the garage, so I figured the right thing was to let them know just in case I didn’t see a scratch on the car. After dinner I figured no one called or knocked on the door, so I figured either they where on vacation or maybe nothing was wrong with their car which was the best the ideas.

Around 11 something I heard someone messing at the door and then a knock on the door. It was our caretaker, with a card telling me I won for decorating my balcony. Well, I don’t celebrate Christmas and this year my Chanukaih isn’t out by the patio window because I just haven’t moved anything in front of it because dad goes in and out and I don’t want him tripping over something. We where both a little confused as to what did I win, and how I won. So the caretaker told me open it, because she was interested in knowing what it was about.

I got a thank you note for being honest and saying something when most people would just leave and say nothing. The person who wrote the note said this might be strange or something a long that line. Yes I will give her that, because normally when mishaps happen people don’t reward honesty. Most of the time you get people claiming their is far more damage then what there really is, like what happened to my husband a few years ago. They tried to hit him for a good amount of money on a tiny scratch. Which could have simply been fixed with one of those paint bottles. In the back of our minds we was worried about that, and I was worried about a huge increase in car insurance. I never do stupid things, I guess yesterday wasn’t stupid. The van died and I put it in neutral to restart it, and it rolled I moved the wheel just the right way and it did the roll where it shouldn’t have.

So I guess people are still honest. I have to say, I am surprised I got a gift certificate just because I was honest. I just wanted to do the right thing, honesty is a treasure that is hard to find.  The reward even with out that is not having to worry about car insurance increasing, and not worrying about coming up with money for repairs. 🙂 Plus the real reward is her being honest that there was no damage. I guess a simple “thank you” would have made me just as happy. 🙂 Not saying I am not happy about the gift certificate because I am it actually helps us get some things which we don’t have the money for, so it’s a blessing.

I can’t wait till I start my new job, I had orientation on Monday and it went okay. My next trying is the 6th, to bad it can’t be sooner I am excited about starting the new job.

I’m bored

There is not a whole lot to do when you haven’t been earning any money. I know dad is probably just as bored as I am, and is wanting to start learning how to get around. The problem with his is his van is not good right now and He can’t just up and go where ever he wants and I am stuck home even though my van is okay for the most but there is some problems.
Dad said yesterday he wanted to go to the casino, I am fine with that but he didn’t like me saying he should only spend 30. He wants to spend his allowance for the entire week and then some, but then he wants to take a vacation in FL or AZ. He going to have to pick what is more important to him, gambling or taking a vacation down south.
I start my new job on Monday at least the orientation part of my job, I wonder if this will be considered health care career since it’s working with children with special needs or what field this is considered. I know it will be a great first step to my Master in Counseling and will give me great experience working with children and their families in time. I can’t say I look forward to all the training but training is the necessary evil with every job this one should be funnier then other trainings because I will actually be learning something.
On the days, I work full time we will probably get dad involved in activities over at the community center, and get him lunch from over there because it will probably be easier for us that way. Dad don’t cook or clean or anything he tries to help out but he don’t as agile as he used to be. Plus he don’t remember anything.

I got the job

I finally got a call that was long over due. Well not overdue from the company but when you been looking for a job for 4 months seriously and for close to a year trying to find something stable. Now I will finally be able to work a stable job and hopefully get all my bills paid, and still get the credit card and college stuff done, so this will be good. It’s only 24.5 hours a week but that’s really all I can do with college and living with dad.

I am so excited because this is the job I wanted from the beginning of applying for the job, and then had the good interview. I was about to start giving up hope because of not hearing from them in the first part of the week, or the end of last week.  I consider today to be the middle of the week. There will be no Saturday or Sunday hours, and fridays I am off at 430pm. 🙂  So this works now I will need to figure out if dad wants to come to service on Fridays it means one of us needs to come back home and pick him up, but if that what needed I will do it. I will do anything for my husband dad. I will be working in the afternoon everyday and 2 days I will be working in the AM, which is great. I can’t wait for my first day of actual working with them. I love children and this job will be working with children with special needs, which is something I enjoy doing.

I guess this will be good now I just have to figure out what activity I want to get involved with at church because we been asked to transfer to the new church so I am feeling a little lost as far as that goes because I was doing children worship on Saturday, and that doesn’t seem to be needed at the new chruch.

Where’s my pillow

Where’s my pillow, I brought them in, they should be in your bedroom. I thought you told me you slept better yesterday having your 3 pillows. Dad asked for his pillows, not pills so I got a little confused as to what he was needing because he had all but one pillow in here, and the other one in the van frozen shut. I did check dad’s room in case they fall on the floor and he couldn’t find his pillows.

Later I told dad when we go to my doctor appointment you will need to bundle up. He said okay, and asked where his PILLS were, his pillows. Oh your meds Pills not Pillows. We had a good laugh at that one. At least we are laughing today and not wanting to hurt someone.

I am so tired of my sister in law disrespect of her dad it sad. She now trying to use her children to manipulate my husband, dad and I. I will not be manipulated by her, if she wanted to see dad she should have respect for him.  The other day dad decided he wasn’t going there, after I encouraged him to see the kids, and get them presents since he could offord it. It’s amazing how I become the evil sister in law, when I am the reason for my husband talking to his sister who he wanted nothing to do with. It’s amazing that when dad wants to throw in the hat, I encourage him not to because she is his daughter and he loves her even though her behavior towards him is crappy.

I have tried very hard to keep the peace in the family. Dad choice on his own to move in with my husband and I.. I told him our home was always open, the first week he lived here he was so tired he just slept. So hmmm Lets see I am evil when he getting feed, sleeping well, and having some fun and has plenty of money lift over for the month for spending after all his bills were paid. Yeah I am horrible that’s right, because I doing the right thing. He will even have money to take a trip down south like he been wanting to probably by march.

I couldn’t help but feel like telling her last night, Actually mom hated you because you always treated them so badly and if mom told you anything it was what she knew you wanted to hear because she was scared of what you might do to her and dad. My sister in law is very ugly and not talking physically and it’s getting hard not to stoop down to her level here, but I will not do that, because telling her mom and dad hate her wouldn’t be right. I know mom and dad both love her, but they are sick of the way she treats them. Dad has had it and I guess I have had it with being kind and patient with her and having her treat me horrible, and her lies are just to much. So I throw in the hat, and give up. I don’t normally quit but sometimes it’s the best action to take and let G-d because He is the only one who can handle her.

We have dad taking his pills everyday almost except when we forget to make sure he took them, for the most dad will ask for them, or take them on his own. When he wasn’t living her he refused, and he’s being feed well. We are trying met his needs. Maybe on my way home from doctor I will stop at the community center and see if I can find out what Senior activities they have for dad to get involved in.

I wanna know now!

Yes I sound like the kid who wants it’s way now and not later. I had a interview last week, and was hoping to find out information by Friday, I got a email Friday telling me they still haven’t made any decisions. I know the job I would be good at and it would probably be so much better then where I am currently working, or not working since they aren’t giving me any work. I am so sick of Temp companies I could cry. It amazing when I first started to work there I had confidence and I felt confident in my ability as a whole, I was comfortable in my skin with the Yes I need to improve and strengthen things but now I feel like overly nervous and unsure of my self. It’s amazing how rejection can do that but I understand it. This job would be great because it would be working with children with special needs, and I love children. It would be great as far as going for my master in counselling after I finally complete my degree in Business management. Why the business management degree. I been told enough times not to get the doctorate in Psychology, because it worthless with out a higher degree and well a business degree would be great for me because it opens more door not to mention that if I eventually want to open my own counseling center I can, I will have a degree and knowledge of how to create my business and how to run it. I am gaining the tools I need.
I was talking to someone at church the other day, and she told me that I am the type who gives 110% and been through a lot of rejection and so on and so forth and was worried about how I would handle being rejected from this job. To be honest if I am rejected it’s going to hurt and it will be yet another disappointment but I know there is something out there and I will continue looking and trying.
The thing is my job isn’t going to make me who I am, neither will my husband or his father who is know living with us. Sometimes finding a job is like using diet pills it takes awhile to finally get the result you wanted and if you give up you’ll never get the result you wanted. So I will just keep pushing on and maybe find somewhere to go to rebuild my confidence because that will need help. Now I know when I lift I had some positive feedback so I have a little bit of hope but I won’t get my hopes to up there.

I walked

Today I met one of my friends at my local Perkins. We have been friends for many years now, and she probably should know by know if it’s close I am just going to walk over and not drive it. I love walking but I been having trouble with my asmtha, I am in a asthma episode been in one for a couple days which means name to call a doctor. I figured walking was better then driving because I have no heat in the van, and it wasn’t raining at the time and the wind wasn’t bad so I will just walk.
I think people have forgotten how to drive with rain snow mix.
I spent a couple hours at the restuarant with my friend sharing with her about my insane sister in law and the bad behavior she has had toward dad and us. We had good service, I was surprised that they are now charging .49 cents for a muffin with their breakfast oh well. No big deal. I had the chimi thingys I like getting them, they are good and not to spicey. We spent some time sharing about how our asthma been this year. This year it seems like my asthma been worst, and harder to handle, but know I been off my meds since a little bit before the summer. I guess it time to call in. I was sharing with my friend about one of the meds she is on which caused my heart to race in an unhealthy way, one of those they took me off of right away. She said that the med did the same thing to her. My only advise was go and talk to your doctor if you hearts racing. The rescue inhaler already cause the heart to speed up, so having a preventitive making it race probably isn’t good.
I think she on Orovo for something she on so many meds it frighting I am glad I only need meds for asthma and for upset stomach when I am on all the meds I should be on. That why I hate taking them is my stomach gets upset always. I was glad I was able to get out.

You better have a army

You and whose army, I know everyone familiar with that saying. I know I heard it a lot growing up. My sister in law has been impossible to want to deal with, yesterday she called dad threating him. Dad was worried she actually be able to get down here. All I have to say is to get to dad your going to have to get through me, and well that’s going to be you and whose army.
Dad served in WW2, he does not deserve this type of disrespect from her or her friends. Dad biggest problem is he would give the shirt off his back if someone needed. I know dad not prefect, but still no matter what he doesn’t deserve childish behavior from an adult daughter. She had nothing better to do then call him and harrassing him, she told him she would send someone here to hurt him. We told dad keep the doors locked. If they come call the Police, and tell them what been happening.
If this crap don’t stop with my sister in law, she might have harrassement charges slapped on her as quickly as she can count to one. Enough is enough, dad doesn’t need to be told she going to hurt him, or someone else will. What has wrong with this woman that she thinks the whole word revolves around her and everyone gotta side with her.
Tonight taking dad to get his stuff, I was told something from someone. The person told me they worried for my well being getting the stuff because of something said. I choice to go and see what would happen, figure there is no need to get police involve unless something happens. I will give the person the benefit of the doubt expecially since some other things have been said, that made things more clearer. Nothing happened I was safe the whole time like I figured I would be, sometimes it’s easier to assume evil of people but sometimes you have to go with knowing G-ds there and in control.
It seems my sister in law causes so much trouble, and so much stress for dad. I know she his daughter and wants to have something to do with her but just can’t handle it. She thinks we made him come up here, well no dad decide it was better for him. He more happier here. You know he hasn’t smoked that much since he been up here with us, there is no tempation of alcohol for him. I can’t believe the little rat told dad he need to sober up, when in this house hubby and I do not have anything in here that could get dad or us drunk. Someone needs a reality check. Dad came up here because he is safe with us. He is loved and protected, you’d better bring your army with you, if your missing with dad.
Families can be messy sometimes, families are hard but that don’t make it right to lie about someone in the family. The thing is I can’t believe anything my hubby sister says because she known to make up stories about dad when she didn’t get her way. Dad wanted to go down for Christmas but know he don’t even want to do that, but he will miss christmas. Hubby and I do not celebrate it and we have no interest in it. We will need to find dad some thing to do to celebrate christmas, maybe some church will have some Christian videos night there about Christmas and it will make dad feel better. He not where we are at faith wise and I do not expect him to be. Hubby and I might not agree with everything dad does but we will be supportive of dad.

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