Just Pass Me By

Yes I sound like the kid who wants it’s way now and not later. I had a interview last week, and was hoping to find out information by Friday, I got a email Friday telling me they still haven’t made any decisions. I know the job I would be good at and it would probably be so much better then where I am currently working, or not working since they aren’t giving me any work. I am so sick of Temp companies I could cry. It amazing when I first started to work there I had confidence and I felt confident in my ability as a whole, I was comfortable in my skin with the Yes I need to improve and strengthen things but now I feel like overly nervous and unsure of my self. It’s amazing how rejection can do that but I understand it. This job would be great because it would be working with children with special needs, and I love children. It would be great as far as going for my master in counselling after I finally complete my degree in Business management. Why the business management degree. I been told enough times not to get the doctorate in Psychology, because it worthless with out a higher degree and well a business degree would be great for me because it opens more door not to mention that if I eventually want to open my own counseling center I can, I will have a degree and knowledge of how to create my business and how to run it. I am gaining the tools I need.
I was talking to someone at church the other day, and she told me that I am the type who gives 110% and been through a lot of rejection and so on and so forth and was worried about how I would handle being rejected from this job. To be honest if I am rejected it’s going to hurt and it will be yet another disappointment but I know there is something out there and I will continue looking and trying.
The thing is my job isn’t going to make me who I am, neither will my husband or his father who is know living with us. Sometimes finding a job is like using diet pills it takes awhile to finally get the result you wanted and if you give up you’ll never get the result you wanted. So I will just keep pushing on and maybe find somewhere to go to rebuild my confidence because that will need help. Now I know when I lift I had some positive feedback so I have a little bit of hope but I won’t get my hopes to up there.

Today I met one of my friends at my local Perkins. We have been friends for many years now, and she probably should know by know if it’s close I am just going to walk over and not drive it. I love walking but I been having trouble with my asmtha, I am in a asthma episode been in one for a couple days which means name to call a doctor. I figured walking was better then driving because I have no heat in the van, and it wasn’t raining at the time and the wind wasn’t bad so I will just walk.
I think people have forgotten how to drive with rain snow mix.
I spent a couple hours at the restuarant with my friend sharing with her about my insane sister in law and the bad behavior she has had toward dad and us. We had good service, I was surprised that they are now charging .49 cents for a muffin with their breakfast oh well. No big deal. I had the chimi thingys I like getting them, they are good and not to spicey. We spent some time sharing about how our asthma been this year. This year it seems like my asthma been worst, and harder to handle, but know I been off my meds since a little bit before the summer. I guess it time to call in. I was sharing with my friend about one of the meds she is on which caused my heart to race in an unhealthy way, one of those they took me off of right away. She said that the med did the same thing to her. My only advise was go and talk to your doctor if you hearts racing. The rescue inhaler already cause the heart to speed up, so having a preventitive making it race probably isn’t good.
I think she on Orovo for something she on so many meds it frighting I am glad I only need meds for asthma and for upset stomach when I am on all the meds I should be on. That why I hate taking them is my stomach gets upset always. I was glad I was able to get out.